4 Hard Downs: Fun Kid Summer, English Muffins, Michigan & TCU plus

How did TCU abuse Michigan like that, plus free kids for the summer and homemade english muffins

Kids are finishing school and buddy, they are out there.

Between the grocery store, Starbucks, local bakery/coffee shops; basically everywhere that isn’t a bar, there are kids.

Weird teens. Mall teens. Harris Teeter and Publix everyday teens. Goth teens. Jock teens. Working teens who got their first job. Walking teens. Student driving teens. Which leads us to:

Mean teens

I don’t have teen fear. It seems like so many people are so viscerally traumatized by high school and middle school that “bully teens” scare them as adult. It is probably some combination of loving those two parts of my life and my parents talking about how “ain’t shit” teens are, since they spent their life in education of said teens, that I just harbor no issues with teens.

Teens are inherently scared of adults.

Telling a teen to shut up usually is enough. Whether you’re at a minor league baseball game or at the mall, saying, “hey, I got a 5 year old here, knock it off,” generally gets results. Being afraid of someone who can’t buy beer or cigarettes was never in my playbook for being an adult.

As a kid, I spent a lot of time having adults tell me what to do, shit, I spent a lot of time doing wrong things and running through backyards to avoid adults. Once I became an adult the last thing that was going to happen was have a child dictate to me. Except my child, but that is a different story.

So, don’t be scared of teens. You’re worried about your mortgage, how to feed a teen and your blood pressure, they’re worried about acne and tiktok.

Let’s go ahead and do what we do…SPOT THE BALL!!!

1st Down: SUMMER SHOULD BE FUN

I can’t take credit for this but we all know that there was a time that Summer House, on Bravo, wasn’t insufferable and wildly gross, but it did give us this line:

As we hit summer this is my first, at home in Charlotte, summer with a kid. Not a baby, but a real deal, full blown kid. And summer should be fun.

Summer means going to grandparents, sleepovers, cook-outs, camp, getting dirty, being outside, neighborhood kid shit, lawn games, movies, s’mores, rainy day reading, sports, avoiding your parents because they’ll make you clean or do yardwork.

You know, normal summer stuff.

We got a pool membership. We got a museum pass that should be good for rainy days. We got a park near us with an elite splashpad within 12 minutes. We got a greenway that is 5 minutes away.

Don’t. Be. In. The. House.

We also have croquet, badminton, cornhole, stomp rockets, sports equipment, we got a splash pool and we’re getting a slip’n’slide, should be here on Thursday.

This is summer, let’s get buckwild. As Kyle said, “Summer Should Be Fun!!”

We’re working on it. What are your summer memories and how did you make summer fun. I’m rooting for my kid gaining confidence to roam the neighborhood and link up with her friends via door knocking, not asking me or my wife to text their parents.

2nd Down: English Muffins But For Burgers

I love English Muffins.

The nooks. The crannies. They stand up great to butter and provide some crisp but soft taste that is toothsome and delicious.

They’re also great for burgers. My buddy Hunter, who works over at Overtime, took me to a spot in the Upper Westside that does their burgers on English Muffins. It was a mind-bending game changer.

After some experimenting, here is my recipe:

2 tsp active dry yeast, not rapid rise

1/4 cup APF

1 tsp sugar

1/2 cup warm water

Combine that to start and let bloom for 10-15 minutes

The Sponge Is The Key

1 & 3/4 cups APF

2 tsp vegetable oil

1.5 tsp sea salt

1 egg white

Some recipes will say ghee, or butter, I actually fry/cook mine in bacon fat. It’s around, it costs nothing (we already have the bacon) and it gives them the savory I’m looking for to make burgers. It is a sticky dough that rises for 2 hours, then you should have 6 rounds that rise for 90 more minutes. then in a medium hot cast iron skilled with the bacon fat you throw them on for a few minutes a side.

Fork split them, don’t knife them. You’ll get your nooks and crannies. And toast them on your steel or flat top to make sure they stand up to your burgers. A great, savory way to enjoy english muffins at dinner.

Oh and here, plus hear, hot burgers with sound for the smash!

3rd Down: Michigan Just Was Not A Threat

We are going to get more in depth with this for Thursday’s Fun Play, but on an early view, thanks to reader McCook, I’m revisiting the playoff. Starting with how TCU had success against Michigan’s “best in the nation” offensive line.

It wasn’t the line, it was the lack of weapons.

Yes, TCU’s line had some great short yardage showings where they flooded the space, but at the end of the day it was about TCU knowing they could cover Michigan and that created the problems.

Rush 3, get there. Rush 4, somehow still move JJ McCarthy off his line. Line up wrong and still get a TFL from Abe Camara because Michigan was moving like a sloth in molasses.

“Yeah, but they had those long plays”

Yeah, they did, they got off on TCU and then when the field got shortened, time got quick, they didn’t have a ton to offer. Michigan had long plays, but less than half as many plays over 20 yards as they had negative plays, 4 sacks and 13 TFLs for TCU.

The Frogs picked their spots and got burned 6 times, Michigan got burned 17, not including turnovers and no or minimal gains. That’s how you win a ball game when the other team is supposed to be superior.

Will draw some up this week for Thursday.

4th Down: Summer Salads, Let’s Go

Growing up, almost everyday, in the summer, we had a salad. A garden salad with like iceberg lettuce, tomato and cucumber and some dressing. Hidden Valley Ranch. Wishbone Italian. Wishbone Italian. Some weird brand of Russian.

I’m bringing it back.

Little kids just had salad put on their plate. Big kids and adults got a separate bowl for their salad. Big kids made the salad. That was part of the kitchen duties along with setting the table and washing the dishes after the meal.

I’m bringing it back.

My kid is about to have a summer of slip’n’slide, croquet, pool and when you get home you make that salad and that’s life. Go to the garden and pick stuff out. Wash it. Cut it up. Make that salad.

Kids roaming, TCU roaming and it is time for summer. Tell a friend about the newsletter for sure, because if you like it, they probably will too.

Cheers!!