4 Hard Downs: Slow Down Man, Tommy Rees & Lifeguard Life!!
Also a nose bleed, baserunning vids, lifeguard life and what does Rees bring to Bama
My kid busted my face wide open this week.
Not a joke or even an exaggeration, a 30 minute nosebleed after she caught me with a smooth elbow to my left nostril and bridge of my nose. No pics b/c it was a lot of blood and debate about going to the hospital. But it was good effort on her part and a really strong showing.
I’m proud of her.
Getting and being tough is a thing we work with all the time. Part of being tough and aggressive is firing an elbow when your dad is tickling you. Part of being tough jumping off the diving board. Part of being tough is getting up when you trip and fall.
And part of being tough is bugs.
We have all the other parts down, but her first summer in the south is just getting her ass. Chiggers. Mosquitoes. We haven’t even got to bees or wasps yet. They are just giving her the work. Like, “I want to go inside because I’m itchy,” work. Like, “Can we do the movie inside instead of outside,” work.
She shares my wife’s susceptibility to insect bites and it has had me recreate our First-Aid kit. Things I never thought I’d have, lidocaine, hydrocortisone en masse and some other itch creams and sprays are now in the mix.
I am ready for anything, and I’m sure you’re ready for this…SPOT THE BALL!!!
1st Down: Slow Down Man Is Here!!
No, really, he is here!!
So speaking of safety; people are flying through my neighborhood, one with an already too high speed limit of 25 if you ask me. Something had to be done. I noticed when I was out talking to neighbors or doing yardwork near the curb and stepped out into the street people slowed down.
I got online and tried to find the best safety deterrents and things that I could use to slow people down while our kids play on the block. No, Hodge, I can’t get spike strips like the police have in chases. In Chicago my neighbors had the sandwich board style and based on everything I’ve seen, they’re to flimsy to help.
I’ve seen people hit them and nothing happens.
Same with the on property signs that say, “drive like your kid lives here.”
THEIR KIDS DO LIVE HERE AND THEY DRIVE LIKE THIS! WITH THEIR KIDS IN THE CAR!
Settled on Slow Down Man by Go Sports. He’s bright. He is heavier than the sandwich boards once you fill him with water. This guy can hurt your car if you’re speeding and hit him; he’s gonna get underneath there and you’ll have a problem that makes you stop. He has a flag, for the curve. But, the coolest part are these bright signs with cheeky sayings that you can put on him to let people know you hate what they’re doing.
They’re single transfers. So you can put them on your Slow Down Man but once you take them off to change, they’re done. I put them on paper and then got them all laminated and fitted them with velcro. Now, I’ve got multi-use, changeable and still big eye catchers to remind folks to slow down.
(My mom did take the STFD (slow the fuck down) one away from me. She is worried some psycho will attack me if I put that one up.)
That’s how I put him and thank you for coming for my public service announcement. Slow it down. Summertime and the living is good, let’s keep living by not hitting some kid while you’re on the phone or speeding because you left late.
2nd Down: Lifeguard Sympathy From Me, The Kid
I do not like going to the pool. I do not like being hot. I do not like sweating. I do not like being wet. I do not like being outside. I do not like being barefoot. I do not like the pollen from the pine tree that is directly behind our seating area. I do not like being ashy. I do not like like hauling stuff. I do not like leaving my house in the middle of the day when I could be in the yard.
But, I have a kid.
Which means I go to the pool sometimes. I go off the diving board. I dive in the deep well. I throw toys in the shallow play space. I pack lunches and snacks. I load up the car. I bring lotion so when I’m done I can un-ashy myself.
This falls in line with first-aid, safe driving though; the old lifeguard in me comes out.
Multiple times I’ve yelled, ‘No Running!!” to kids I do not know. I watch the deep well vigilantly to make sure kids aren’t going at the same time from the side and off the diving board. “Feet first only” when kids are jumping off the side in the shallow zone. Alerting parents so they can move smaller kids away from big kid roughhousing, or conversely, asking the big kids to move away from the small kids.
Safety first!!
3rd Down: Crying Is Therapeutic
I have reached a point where I cry everyday in the morning.
I’m not joking. I’m not mentally unstable (well maybe, but not because of this). I’m not seeking out sad things. I’m not in mourning.
I just see things that I love and it makes me so happy I cry.
I cried at how beautiful Avatar 2: Way of the Water was visually. I also cried at the story and the conflict. It was an hour too long, but I still know I will revisit it time and again. I liked it so much I did a thing I never do, recommended it to my dad.
He will not watch it, especially at over 3 hours.
But what my dad does watch are Instagram Reels, and he sends them to me.
And every morning, almost without fail, he has either sent me one that will make me cry, or I scroll and find one that makes me cry and send it to him. Now, here is the kicker, they’re not sad and depressing videos from doom scrolling.
They are videos about baseball and softball.
Here is my favorite:
I didn’t even realize it was UNC, I just saw the base running plus the pop-up slide and was like, “dad will love this” and he did and I had already cried watching it. This is the stuff we worked on, not at actual practice for little league, but he would just drive me and my brother to Mason Wallace Park and have us shag balls and work on running bases. Work on making that turn at first to maximize getting to the next bag.
*She is so amazingly fast and not worried about not getting to third, the outside step put her on a direct line and it is gorgeous base running*
We had our own bases. We had our own mound. I remember digging the dirt out of the chute for the bases with a spoon so we could practice as a family.
Every morning we send each other videos like this, or bucket dad, or travel ball mom or coaching tips from the diamond. They all make me cry and I think it is some confluence of remembering doing all of these things with my dad and realizing I am a dad who is, hopefully, going to be doing these things with his kid. And that my dad will also be there helping with my kid, like my grandpa was with me.
Maybe it is silly and I’m emotionally unstable. However, it helps me get ready for the day and connect with my dad on a level that isn’t just, “can you watch her” and “are you going to swim lessons” or “what time are we meeting for lunch.”
It is just a him and me thing.
4th Down: Tommy Rees Deep Dive Coming Thursday
This is the last of the Alabama look in; I just think they’re the most interesting and questionable of the big names as a team people are going to assume will be ok. Folks are questions UGA and Ohio State way more than the Tide and I just think zeroing in is important.
Tommy Rees comes over from Notre Dame as the OC and the biggest thing I’ve been watching is his risk taking and playcalling. So that is Thursday, we will get into some plays I love, some plays I wonder how Bama fans; newly used to 1st round QBs, stomach.
The Tide want to stretch the field and there isn’t much of that on top from him. We’ll get into the bigger question Wednesday and Thursday, but figured I’d give y’all a heads up.
Stay safe this summer. Drive slow. Make sure your First-Aid is ready and make pita.
Cheers!!